Responding to Employee Negativity: A Pervasive Problem or Just a Bad Day?
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We have bad days and then complain about it. We blow off steam, emote a little, refocus, and return to work. For others, complaining is habit, leading to a continual state of negativity, whether focused inwardly or directed towards others. When it infects co-workers, a team, department, or workforce, negativity can have devastating impacts on teamwork, morale, engagement, turnover, productivity, and even the organization's reputation.
What do we do when an employee is routinely negative? I pose some questions to consider:
What Is the Nature of the Negativity?
Not all negative attitudes are the same nor should be treated in the same manner. Negativity can involve:
- Catastrophizing. Thinking the worst about one's own or other's actions, a situation, or anticipated outcomes. This is bad enough when directed inwardly but can foment doubt and anxiety when directed at others, causing them to worry their efforts will lead to very bad -- that is, catastrophic -- results.
- Exaggeration and speaking in absolutes. Modifiers like "always," "never," "worst," and "horrible" applied to another's actions or behaviors are not only unfair and inaccurate, but put people in a box, suggesting better actions, behaviors, or results are "never" possible.
- Sarcasm. Sarcasm can bring levity. But when expressed bitterly, such as saying, "Why should that [outcome] be any different?" "You've exceeded my expectations [for failure]," or "That sounds like loads of fun [when the task is thankless]," it masks displeasure in lieu of expressing concerns more directly.
- Broken records. Saying "we tried that" or other messages referencing past efforts as a means for not pursuing similar efforts now or for dismissing new ideas.
- Criticism about absent third parties. This is harmful gossip that leaves doubt among message recipients that the person will next speak ill of them behind their back.
- Manipulative attacks on another's character or competence. One example is presenting unverifiable information from alleged "others" reporting concerns about a person's performance or behavior. This shows cowardice to express concerns more directly, honestly, and fairly.
- Self-criticism. Self-deprecating behaviors directed solely at oneself and suggesting deeper issues of esteem, confidence, and psychological harm beyond others' ability to help.
- You name it. Negativity can involve blaming, whining, hopelessness, passive-aggression, and so forth. You know you are dealing with a negative person if you feel drained after interacting with them.
How Intense Is the Negativity?
Whether a response to someone's negativity is needed or appropriate depends on how intense, persistent, and pervasive the negativity is. Imagine a spectrum where, at one extreme, we may call the negativity simply "a bad day," whereas at the other extreme, it occurs "all day, every day." And then, within this spectrum, we might consider whether, even on a single bad day, the negativity is so intense, disruptive, and impacting many others that a response is warranted. Other variables to consider are the extent to which productivity, morale, civility, collaboration, engagement, safety, and security from harm are affected.
What Is Your Responsibility?
What is your relationship to the negative person? If you are simply annoyed by a co-worker, you have choices whether to ignore, confront, complain, and so forth. If you are the leader and see others impacted by an employee's negativity, you probably shouldn't ignore and tolerate it. As the sole person impacted by a negative co-worker, perhaps you have no other obligation than to yourself to respond, though you might feel a moral obligation as a bystander to step in if you see the behavior impacting others. As a leader, you have a direct organizational, supervisory responsibility to ensure a productive, safe, welcoming workplace, and therefore, an obligation to confront the behavior, as appropriate.
What Are Your Choices?
Your judgments about the above considerations will guide you in determining whether a response is due, the approach you'll take, and the nature of your response. Among your choices are:
- Ignore. You might do this if your co-worker or direct report is having a bad day, and the negativity is brief and occasional. We all have bad days. Offer empathy and support, but otherwise let the person work through their struggles. They'll get back on track soon.
- Confront. Use your best difficult conversations skills to objectively, supportively call attention to repeated behaviors, the impacts on you or the team, and the change you request. As a co-worker, ask not to be further exposed to the negativity. As a leader, ask the individual to desist addressing concerns with others and come to you instead, preferably with legitimate concerns, not random venting, and with a mindset of proactively seeking solutions.
- Coach. Underlying an employee's negativity may be legitimate issues they are clumsily trying to communicate. As a leader, consider what coaching you might provide to help them more productively bring forth concerns rather than pointlessly vent. Help them constructively identify mindsets and approaches for managing the issues causing them to be negative.
- Conflict resolution. Perhaps the employee is masking deeper tensions with a co-worker or the team. Their "fight or flight" reactions may be their way of coping absent the ability or confidence to manage the situation more constructively. Provide support and tools for addressing the matter, whether through coaching, mediation, or similar facilitated communication processes.
- External support. Helping an employee whose negativity is inwardly focused and impacting their well-being is beyond the capability and expectations of leaders and team members. HR may be an initial contact but is not the only source. The organization's employee assistance or wellness program can advise how to sensitively direct an employee to seek appropriate counseling services.
- Consequences. Some negativity involves bullying, abrasive, and manipulative behaviors. Imposing consequences may be necessary. The best approaches offer continued, often deeper forms of coaching and counseling, to help the employee realize it is their choice to accept the support and endeavor to change but that continuing with current behaviors will not be tolerated.
What Is the End Goal?
We all want employees to be free from attitudes and behaviors that keep them from feeling supported, safe, and productive. What will you do to address an employee's negativity that will accomplish this goal and, whenever possible, help the employee become a contributing member of the workplace rather than a distraction to it?